The Button Family: Too funny to keep to myself

I just got back from taking the kids to the store. As I was driving through the parking lot, Katie said, "Out of my way sonny". She said it a few more times. At first I thought she was talking to the pedestrians all over the parking lot. Then I thought she was talking to me. I said, "Are you talking to me Katie?" She said, "No, I'm talking to the sun".

Tommy & Katie funny quotes

Katie is getting ready to baptized so it comes up in conversation a lot. Like when I said, "Isn't it neat that you will be washed clean and all your mistakes gone, like a fresh new start?" and she said, "And we'll have to change our names and move to Alabama?" I missed that lesson. Or the time she was cheating at a game we were playing and I said, "you shouldn't cheat, you're about to be baptized" and she said, "I know, I need to get it all out because it's almost the end of the road".

Tommy patted my belly and asked, "how long did you say it takes this to go away?" I was like, what? "You're tummy...after you have a baby" I told him a minimum of 8 years.

I was sharing some popcorn with the kids while I was driving. We were passing the bag back and forth. One of my turns was too long I guess and the kids were shouting for me to pass it back. When I finally did Tommy said, "Surprisingly she didn't eat that much".

As I was getting Katie ready for school after a long weekend, I found some homework in her backpack that we didn't do. She said, "In three days we couldn't do the homework!"

My nephews told Tommy that my laptop was really nice. He said, "Ya, my Dad's laptop is like Wall-E and my mom's is like Eva".

Some of the kids in Tommy's class are expressing their doubts about Santa. Tommy told me there was even a boy in 5th grade who didn't believe. Tommy said, "He's in 5th grade! He should be smart enough to know there is a Santa".

Tommy whispered something to me as we were taking Katie to school. I knew he was going to suggest something fun for us to do without Katie so I told him to wait and tell me in a minute. Then Katie was very curious so she said, "tell me Tommy. I can take it, I give you my word."

When I told Katie to stop swinging on the mantle, she said, "Do you want me to save the world or not?"

I was watching a cartoon with Tommy. I told him it was weird that one of the characters was not getting along with his friend. Tommy said,"well mom you have to know there is a back story".

Katie to Tommy, "Kiss me on the cheek Tommy. That's the only way I will forgive you for kicking me in the throat." This particular element of my blog may come to an end if the quotes continue to be this disturbing.

We were eating at KFC. Katie wanted to take home the balloon tied to her chair. I told her she could if she stopped playing with it and finished eating. She said, "then I can play with the balloon in the car?" I said, "yes" she said, "and marry it?" and I said, "yes, you can marry it" she said, "but we just met".

While Katie and I were doing the dishes, she had a couple of good ones. I was putting chili in the garbage disposal and she said, "eww, that stinks". Then I pushed it down with my hand and she said, "eww mom, I can't believe your doing that, it's so gross". Wait until she has kids, she'll realize nothing is gross anymore. Then I was scrubbing a dish. Grabbing the spray hose she said, "Allow me".

Katie to her grandma at the dinner table: Feed me if you dare. (think Puss in Boots from Shrek)

Tommy was correcting Katie on her ABCs because instead of saying LMNOP she says elmo elmo P. It hurt her feelings so I was explaining to him that we need to encourage each other. He finally conceded and said, "You win this round mommy".

Tommy was trying to get Mike to play his transformers video game with him: You don't practice that's why you're not good at it. I want you to practice.

Tommy and I were watching a dinosaur special on the Discovery channel. They were giving details about how certain dinosaurs lived. I asked Tommy, "How do they know that?" Tommy said: Uh...they're scientists...they're smart.

Tommy telling how Katie had hurt him while they were wrestling: She damaged me a lot.

Me to Tommy while he was chasing Katie around the jewelry stands in Santa Fe: Tommy stop it!
Man selling jewelry: She started it.
So Tommy had a witness.

Me: Katie, go downstairs and finish your lunch.
Katie: But I'm scared.
Me: Tommy is going with you, you'll be fine.
Katie: But we don't have any weapons.
Me: ??? Just hurry up and go eat.
Katie: But I'll fall if I go downstairs too fast.
Me: Just hurry and eat so we can go to the park.
Katie: But I will choke if I eat too fast.

Me: Can you guys please just give me five seconds of peace!
Katie: How about four.

Katie: Mom, Tommy called me a tattletale!

Katie while rolling dice for Clue: Come on, momma needs a new pair of shoes!

Tommy to his friend while playing Star Wars: We need a tail gunner. Let's just imaginate one.

Tommy: This is going to knock your socks off!
Katie: I'm not wearing socks.
Tommy: Katie, it's a joke.

Me: Katie, what happened to your cheek? Did you get hurt?
Katie: No, that's how it's supposed to look.

Me: Do you want any more of your egg, Katie?
Katie: No, thanks for the offer though.

Me: Thanks for being such a good boy at church today.
Tommy: Aw, it was nothing.

Me: These flowers are so pretty.
Tommy: Not as pretty as you.

The Button Family

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Too funny to keep to myself

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Tommy & Katie funny quotes

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